Tomato Sauce

Sam is walking to the grocery store, very big one close to his home, with a paper note on his hand that will remind him things that he needs to buy. Out side is pretty bad, snow is everywhere and it is hard to walk on the street. Monica, his wife gave him the note because he always forgets things that he supposes to buy. You want to forget anything you will come back with tomato cans: “she said”. One hour later Sam backs home with everything that was listed on his note. Potatoes, strawberries, apples, meat, chicken, coke, rice, detergent, soap, and tomato cans of course.

Monica: “did you get everything that I ask you”?

Sam: “ I think so, store was very busy and streets are so bad too, it took lots of time till I got there, but yes I think finally I have everything there”.

Monica: “ok you need to help me before everybody get here, I need help with pasta and the sauce so you can start it with opening two tomato cans and I will boil the pastas till sauce get ready, but do not forget to add the salt and pepper to that cans.

Sam: “roger that”.

Sam takes the tomato cans to the electrical opener that they have to open the lid. Very carefully stick the lid to the magnet part of the opener and then put the blade on the lid and push the bottom to open the lid. Opener sounds as usual and blade is running around the lid, but wait a minute, it looks like nothing is happening; no area of the lid got opened.

Sam: “do you know what is wrong with this opener”?

Monica: “what do mean”?

Monica: “it was working 20 minutes ago, I opened the baby corn can and it did his job very well, by the way I heard that it worked, why you asking”?

Sam: “yes I know, opener was working but can did not get open, looks like the blade was just running over the lid”.

Monica: “Just open it with manual opener and make the sauce we are going to be late for lunch and guests will be here very soon”.

Sam opens the drawer under the neat of cabinet and fined the manual opener while is thinking that who would work with this kind of stuffs anymore.

Sam: “Hellooo, me”!!

He put the blade over the lid and starts to run the opener.

Sam: “Oh my God, now what is wrong with this one”?

Looks like that the tomato can’s lid does not want to cooperate with Sam. He tries three more time and still nothing happened.

Sam: “Honey, this one did not work too”.

Monica: “What did not work too”.

Monica: “ What are you talking about”.

Sam: “I am talking about opener, this one did not open the tomato lid too”.

Monica: “Oh my God, just asked you to do one thing, and can not finish it, too”?

Sam looks mad but do not say anything to the Monica instead is looking to his toolbox.

Sam: “Maybe I can find something to open the stupid lid”.

It is a big toolbox and he did not keep it very organized as well. He start to throw everything is in there on the floor and the kitchen table to find the good tool for his duty.

Sam: “Got it”.

He seems very happy. But kitchen table and the floor look very messy now. Monica is busy with her cooking and still did not see what happened in her kitchen. Sam finally found his big screwdriver and got his hammer too. Same time Monica leaves the room and goes to the great room to see if everything is organized over there.

Sam: “I will show you who is the boss here”. He is talking to the tomato cane.

Sam put the cane on top of the cabinet beside china dishes, which Monica left them there to serve for her guests. Sam put the head of the screwdriver on the lid and uses the hammer to hit the handle of screwdriver. “Bang”: hammer sounds.

“Yaaaaaaaaaaay”: said Sam. He did hit his finger by the hammer. He looks so mad, now he take the screwdriver by his left hand which did not hit by hammer and attack to the tomato cane, after striking the lid for several time, cane slipper from the table, hit his leg and fell on the floor. Sam looks so angry, his right hand and his left leg did hurt and he is sweating but still nothing happened on the tomato cane lid.

Sam heard the main door and understands that their guests are here right now, and he still is challenging with a stupid cane lid. He takes a big saw from his toolbox. He sits on one the chair in the kitchen and put the cane between his laps and tries to cut the cane from the middle by saw. After little try saw slipper and touch Sam’s tight and cut it. His pant is soaked on blood, he wanted so bad to shout and say something but there are guests at great room and he doesn’t want to look crazy in front of them. Now his hand and his foot are bleeding and he looks sweaty and in the so much pain while nothing happened to the cane and lid is still on it. He put the cane on the floor and jumps on the lid by both feet, cane slipper and he fell down from back. He lays on the floor, very dizzy and painful, the tomato cane is sitting on the floor beside his head, he sees it like three canes. After little while he gets up and while is looking at the cane and around the kitchen is thinking too. Suddenly he sees the microwave and now his mind is sparkling.

Sam: “Yes, why I did not think about that earlier.”

He takes the cane from the floor and goes toward the microwave, then open the microwave’s door and put the cane on the microwave and set the microwave on twenty minutes. He breaths like finally he did the good job and sits on the chair in front of the microwave, and thinks after open the lid I have to go to the shower and ask Monica to come and fixes my wounds before I go to meet the guests.

There is a huge explosion voice, which comes from the kitchen, all the guests and Monica are jumping and running toward the kitchen, Monica opens the kitchen door and they run to it. Now everybody is confused and shocked. Sam is standing up in the middle of the kitchen, his face is covered with tomato sauce, microwave is exploded and it’s door is broken and shoot in the sink, all Monica’s China are broken and pieces are everywhere on the kitchen, kitchen ceiling is all covered by tomato sauce. Tomato sauce is on everything from cabinets, table, chairs, window, till fruit and other dishes that Monica prepared. Sam looks so awful, his feet and his hands are bleeding, his face is black of the explosion and also red from lots of sauce, his hair are up and sweaty and dirty, and all his cloths are wet and saucy and bloody.

Sam: “Hi everybody”.

And very fast he looks at Monica and says: “Honey, I can make the Pasta sauce now very fast, I finally opened the cane”.

Everybody is looking at him, nobody is talking and Monica rolling her eyes and looks everywhere in the kitchen. She is thinking: “ya honey you can make a Pasta Kitchen Tomato Sauce”.

She sits on closest chair and takes biggest pieces of her China and is staring at it.